I’ve reached an age and a time of my life
when I see how my life and the world with its
worries and concerns, suffering and evil,
is all impermanent.
Yet, I have to remind myself of that when
I see things in the news that disturb me,
that don’t matter in the greater scheme,
of the passing impermanence.
This remembrance of the impermanence
puts things in perspective for me,
that none of the disturbing things matter
in this transitory existence I am only
a sojourner in.
Bob Boyd
I was a teenager
I thought she was perfection in the female form
I was so smitten with her, I couldn’t see the signs
I couldn’t see how she would eventually cheat on me
I had such tunnel vision that I couldn’t see the inevitable
but it was a good lesson
after the tears dried, I gained great clarity
I became wiser and more adept at seeing the signs,
like looking into a crystal and seeing the future with a woman
like becoming practically bulletproof against assaults on my heart in the years to come
though that too smitten to see the heartache coming was painful
it was one of the greatest lessons of my life.
Bob Boyd
She was a genuinely sweet woman,
kind, warm, friendly to all.
She had a heart of hearts,
caring for all.
On a dreadful summer night
she got drunk with two disreputable men,
supposed to be her friends.
They took advantage of her in the
back seat of a car when she was barely
conscience, too drunk to resist.
Like unfeeling, heartless monsters,
they boasted of their rape conquest
to others in the city where I lived.
She never told the police, perhaps she
didn’t want to endure what was shameful to her.
Her reputation sullied, many were told.
I didn’t want to hear about it, her being
taken advantage of like that, her being drunk.
But unlike others, her reputation wasn’t sullied
with me.
She was still a genuinely sweet woman
and always will be in my mind and in my heart.
Bob Boyd
Why do the thrills of things like
falling in love
first Christmas gifts
first new car
have to get old?
If I had to pick one thrill to last and last,
it would be the sky high thrill of falling in love.
No one would ever get used to it,
Never would it get old.
It would be permanent bliss with a permanent,
loving other.
There’d be no break ups, no broken hearts, no divorces –
continuous romantic love unbroken, always new
always thrilling, always true.
Bob Boyd
My thanks to aging for making me
increasingly aware of the impermanence
of this life and of me.
When younger, I didn’t really get it.
I hadn’t lived enough, seen enough
people, things and events pass away,
like leaves falling off trees on a river bank
and floating away in ever rushing waters,
like ever passing lives.
Now many people and generational icons I knew
are dead – gone forever.
Now I look forward to joining them
in what I believe is a glorious, permanent existence.
Of course, my belief could be wrong.
The only permanence I could die into might
be just a permanent death and nothing more,
no heaven, no nirvana, no eternal bliss, nothing.
Or, I could die and have to come back to
this impermanence again, maybe as
an improved, better me facing all the
uncertainties, the suffering, the evil
in this impermanence once again.
I like my belief better, a permanent world
devoid of the suffering, evil, and impermanence,
a forever world of peace, love and bliss.
And Mike Mchugh and Joe Drew, if you’re reading
this from the other side,
If what I believe is true,
I hope to meet you there too.
Bob Boyd
You see her face
her hair
her eyes
her smile
her alluring body
her enchanting moves
her endearing gestures
This are but the moving parts
The keeper of her secrets
the queen of her intelligence
the source of who she is
the generator of her actions
is her gray matter
her wonanly brain
This is what you should
pay more attention to
rather than being swept away
your mind mesmerized
by the siren-like beauty
of her moving parts
Bob Boyd
I spy the neighbor’s cat under my car,
as I’m about to fire it up and go to the grocery store.
I feel honored the cat has chosen to grace the underbelly of my car with her noble, feline presence.
I met this cat months ago when I was talking to the neighbor who is the cat’s pet; the orange and white feline wonder purred and endearingly rubbed her soft, furry body against my leg.
I felt grateful that she accepted me like that,
as if welcoming me into a human cat kinship with her.
I hate that I have to start my car and scare her away.
It seems almost sacrilegious to me, like trashing a holy relic.
But, alas, I have to get some sustenance from the grocery store,
perhaps I’ll make amends with the cat another day.
Bob Boyd
The Challenge of the Coming Cold
I look forward to the coming cold weather,
the challenge of surviving it with little heat –
intentionally.
Comforters and Sherpa blankets, layers
of warm clothing.
Fire proof space heaters only when
absolutely necessary.
Windows weatherized, door draft stoppers
ready for use.
An indomitable will to withstand the cold,
the challenge, the triumphant victory over it.
Bob Boyd
His body began breaking down
in his early thirties.
He’d been strong and fit, and
couldn’t figure out why.
He went to see a doctor
and was put in a hospital.
He was probed, examined,
his blood taken.
Worst diagnosis possible,
cancer at age 31.
A year later, dead at the
young age of 32.
Why do such awful things
have to happen
to some young people
God, I’m asking you?
Bob Boyd
He used to like to fish
days and nights,
all the time.
To him it was a sport.
He didn’t catch fish to eat.
He caught all kinds of fish,
bass, trout, catfish, perch,
sunfish and more.
Once he even caught a tiny squid.
Once he could have caught
a crab; it hung on to the bait
and finally dropped off.
But there came a time in
his twenties when he could
no longer fish; he could no
catch, harm, or kill fish
for fun.
He didn’t know why that
change in him occurred,
an awakening
he hadn’t expected.
A blessing for the fish.
Bob Boyd
What a feeling it was when as a teenager
for the first time in my life, I held hands with a girlfriend.
Wow! I couldn’t believe how good, how wonderful, it felt.
It was like a fusion of hearts, hers and mine, in that
most special, sweetest of all moments in my teenage days.
I felt like I was melting with bliss inside my heart and
straight to the core of my budding, youthful being.
If only … if only for a wondrous, magical moment,
I could experience that enchanting, teenage feeling again.
Bob Boyd
Sometimes I find the news gets too toxic,
like eating too much unhealthy food.
Sometimes after months and months
of consuming it, my mind gets
a little too filled with it, like a stomach
ache from eating too much food.
At that point, I have to pull back from
the tableau of negative news
and take a self prescribed news fast
to purge the toxicity out of my mind.
Bob Boyd
She didn’t have true love on her mind.
Money was more important to her,
a practical woman.
I don’t care for gold diggers, but I think
I can understand her and commiserate.
I cannot blame her for seeking financial security
and nearly everything that money can buy.
I can understand her desires for the best food,
the best clothes, the best home and more.
Her life becomes sort of a Disneyland where
practically all her dreams and wishes come true.
What works for her, would never work for me;
I’ve no desire for that kind of life.
The glam, the luxuries, the riches mean
nothing to me.
But I can understand how they can make life
more fulfilling, and I can see how nice it would be
to never have to worry about money and be able
to buy nearly anything you want.
And given true love doesn’t always last, maybe
her practical plan is wiser than just seeking
illusive, true love.
Bob Boyd
They planned the great escape for months,
quiet whispers when the lights when out.
The day, the time, the possible methods,
the coordinated efforts, the escape
when the captors would be off guard.
In 2018, they slipped out of their confines
scaled the walls, leapt to freedom.
They surreptitiously stayed out of sight
of those frantically searching for them
They skirted the city, avoided being seen,
made a successful great escape, and
were never seen again, as if they
fully vanished forever from the planet.
the Lab lizards of the University of Virginia.
Bob Boyd
I’ve often read the heart knows what it wants,
as if the heart knew better than the head.
I like the sound and sentiment in that saying;
to me, it suggests the heart is truer in finding love
than the head.
Yet, despite what the heart wants, I think the head
is a far better guide when seeking love.
I base this partly on my own experience,
too often I’ve been led by my heart
when I should have been guided by my head.
And woe upon woes, the heartaches
the heart caused my head.
Bob Boyd
Wandered into Fisher Park brokenhearted;
my bohemian girlfriend Sheila had left me.
Didn’t realize night was approaching,
saw an old stoned friend Jed.
Twilight approached, and I got an
eerie feeling.
An ivory white female apparition,
appeared and telepathically said stop.
I froze, could not move, Jed spaced out
kept moving,
He stepped on a Mongolian Death Worm,
lights out, Jed dead.
Released by the apparition, I evaded the
worm seconds from its death grip.
Made it out of Fisher Park, apparition
appeared again, wife in a former life.
Bob Boyd
The ants assembled
in their underground temple
for community worship
prayers and meditations
unknown to humans
they had had their gods
that like gods of humans
changed with times and dynasties
Eventually their gods evolved
into the Oneness
the essence of them
and everything else
Ironically, or inspiredly,
they named the Oneness Cosmos
Bob Boyd
They called her a carpenter’s dream
because she had small breasts
flat as a board they said
barely a handful they jeered
It didn’t matter to her
It didn’t matter to him
She was far more
than her anatomy
She was far more
than the body she inhabited
Though her physical assets
were alluringly sufficient
her mind held the most prized treasures
the wonders, the magic, only she possessed
small wonder on bended knee
he begged her to be his wife
and she, a queen among women,
kissed him and accepted.
Bob Boyd
Sweet summer days
passed away
Enter the fall
and the chilling winds
The passing of summer
the beginning of fall
reminds me of the changing
human populations
born like the sun rising
dying like summer ending
dying like flowers
in fall
bodies buried
in the cold ground.
Bob Boyd
He sees her passing by in a mall.
God, how he hates seeing her.
He just wants to forget her,
keep her out of his mind,
abolish all those memories,
the good ones, the bad ones.
She sees him too, looks his way.
He doesn’t acknowledge her.
It’s just too damn painful.
He never wants to see her again.
He’s been trying so hard to let go.
Seeing her passing by
brought back all the memories of her.
For a disturbing moment, he lingers
on all the good times:
how good she felt in his arms,
the sweet softness of her body,
the smell of her perfume,
her tender embrace,
the sincerity in her voice
when she said, “I love you.”
With a near herculean mental effort,
he buries those memories
deep in the depths of his mind
and regains some sanity again.
Bob Boyd